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Close your eyes and imagine the following scenario: You’ve had two too many glasses of Sex on the Beach. You think you’re OK to drive. You get in the car and attempt to drive home – only to crash your car into the center divider, killing yourself and the front-seat passenger.

Now imagine another hypothetical situation: You’ve had sex on the beach, and you are drunk with love, intoxicated by the excitement and joy of a new, budding relationship.

You and your partner get in a fight because he/she isn’t calling you back and you have a hunch he/she has been sneaking some extra lovin’ from someone else.

Instead of confronting your partner, you ask a friend (who was recently cheated on) for advice – you figure this person can relate.

Your friend, still smarting from the scar of betrayal and looking for vengeance, replies: “I wish I’d cheated on him/her when I had the chance so he/she would know what it feels like!” In your drunken state, this makes perfect sense. You decide that revenge – even if it is preemptive – is the best strategy. So you do some cheating yourself. (Hey, Bush thought a suspicion of WMD was enough proof to attack, so why not do the same?)

However, while you’re busy spinning a web of drama rivaled only by “All My Children” – or found within a house on Hilgard Avenue – you discover there is a perfectly good excuse for the unreturned phone calls. The only one who’s cheated is you. You’ve driven your relationship into a dead end.

While the result of this hypothetical situation is less physically damaging than the drunk driving scenario, there is an important correlation – and yes, it relates to dating.

Being in love can be a lot like being drunk. Your vision is blurred, your decision-making skills are skewed, and sometimes you should just put the keys down and call a cab. Sometimes you shouldn’t risk driving your relationship into a wall.

It’s an easy decision not to drink and drive, but there’s no chart, no Breathalyzer to tell you when you’re too love-intoxicated to be making sound relationship judgments.

If you can’t see things clearly, the question is: Where should you turn to get sensible advice? It wouldn’t be smart to have a drunk friend determine if you’re capable of driving, so why ask a an infatuated friend for relationship advice?

Therefore, I suggest turning to your single friends for a big, sobering cup of coffee in the form of an objective picture of your relationship.

Single friends don’t let attached friends drive drunk, and they can help you sober up to the legal relationship-driving limit.

Confide in your single friends, and you will find you can both learn from one another. Those who are single can benefit from your detours – and shortcuts – on the relationship road, and vice versa. Single friends can give valid, meaningful and experienced counseling – even if you don’t expect it. So don’t be afraid to hand over the keys and listen to their advice.

How many of you have periodically recalled numerous lessons you’ve learned from failed relationships, only to repeat the same mistakes once more? Raise your hands high and I’m sure you’ll see others doing the same.

The post-breakup stage can be a time of clarity, as the clouds part and all the previously hidden problems with your past relationship are revealed. In addition to recognizing these problems in a single state, the key is to remember them as you step into your next romantic partnership.

Perhaps the term “going steady” stopped with our parents’ generation because a linguist discovered that, more often than not, there’s nothing steady about one’s reasoning skills when engulfed in a serious relationship.

These days, couples are “together.” So unfold your psychological yoga mat and concentrate on increasing your flexibility by opening your relationship chakras. Focus your energy, chi and mojo on arriving at a point of mental and emotional togetherness. And always keep a single friend on speed dial for those occasional unsteady moments.

Bonos is the 2003-2004 copy chief and happens not to be currently intoxicated by a relationship. E-mail her at lbonos@media.ucla.edu for sobering advice. Send general comments to viewpoint@media.ucla.edu.