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When someone first asked me if I’d have sex with a person with HIV, my immediate answer was a resounding no. That was during my freshman year of high school, and the only person in the class who gave an affirmative answer was my teacher.

Initially I was shocked by my teacher’s response – I couldn’t imagine putting myself at risk when I’d been taught my entire life to avoid sexually transmitted infections at all costs. But after listening to my teacher’s explanation and mulling over the idea, I changed my mind.

I have never been faced with such a situation, so I’m speaking in hypothetical terms, but I would hope that someone’s HIV status wouldn’t be the breaking factor in a relationship.

I would be nervous about the idea of copulating with someone who was HIV-positive and I’d probably have to spend some time thinking about the situation, but if I felt it was right for the relationship or if I loved the person, I would take the risk.

I’m not trying to encourage people to be less cautious when it comes to STIs, specifically HIV and AIDS – it’s extremely important for all people to get tested for all STIs if they’re planning to be sexually active, and to take precautionary measures when having sex with people they don’t know well.

However, there are stigmas that surround HIV and AIDS that are hurtful to people who are infected with the virus and that cause people to react with horror whenever the infection is mentioned. Many of the students I talked to immediately assumed that if they contracted HIV, their lives would be over, or at least greatly reduced in length and in quality. A couple people specifically mentioned that they would never be able to have sex again.

While contracting HIV would lead to some huge life changes – there would be daily medications, extra health precautions, doctor’s visits and monetary issues – it’s harsh to assume that life is over once a person is HIV-positive, or that one would be void of all sexual relationships.

While some people I talked to stressed that an HIV-positive person shouldn’t put someone in a position where they would have to make a decision of this sort, I don’t think that’s the issue. Personally, I don’t know what I would do if I found out that I was HIV-positive, but I would hope that people wouldn’t forget that I was a person, and that there are methods of STI prevention, such as condoms, that have an almost 100 percent success rate when used properly.

James Babl, who runs a support group for HIV-positive students through the Student Psychological Services, said that people who have just found out that they are HIV-positive often face depression, fear of how to balance their health and their future, and loneliness. But Babl added that many of his patients have proceeded to live healthy lives, which include relationships and plans for the future.

We can’t really give a life expectancy for people that are HIV-positive: We simply don’t know enough. The first cases of AIDS were noticed in the early 1980s and the virus wasn’t isolated until 1984. So HIV is a relatively new infection. There are also new medical advances, and both the virus and access to health care affect each person uniquely. But many people who are HIV-positive continue to lead healthy lives for many years.

From talking to people, I’ve found that my ninth-grade “Living Skills” class was a little more open-minded than most. While education has been a huge factor in making people aware of the virus, and, for the most part, has done a good job of teaching people caution so as not to contract it, more sex education classes need to discuss the stigmas surrounding HIV and AIDS.

Probably one of the harshest and most hurtful stigmas is blaming the person who is HIV-positive for contracting HIV. People who find out that they’re HIV-positive know this is likely and, according to Babl, blame for being infected is one of the things they fear.

“People forget that everyone makes mistakes sexually,” Babl said. Sometimes those mistakes have bigger repercussions, but blaming people is not constructive. People need support, not guilt.

“It would be helpful if people looked at (HIV/AIDS) in a neutral way,” Babl said. He compared living with HIV to living with diabetes. While diabetes can be dangerous in itself, people aren’t usually blamed for having diabetes. However, people with HIV often face discrimination based on their status.

Many people go through a period of shock after they find out that they’re HIV-positive, Babl said. Even by eradicating the stigmas people associate with HIV, this shock wouldn’t be eliminated. However, it could be reduced if people didn’t fear being blamed or discriminated against because of their HIV status.

With the help of medication, people with HIV are living for longer before they develop AIDS. A lot of this has to do with the amount of money that has been allocated to HIV/AIDS research and the work done in places like the UCLA AIDS Institute. It is not only young adults or sexually active people that are at risk for HIV. The virus affects children too. That’s why programs such as Dance Marathon, which benefits the Elizabeth Glaser Pediatric AIDS Foundation, are so important.

Today is World AIDS Day. The red ribbons are meant to be worn to show support for people living with HIV and as a symbol of hope for the future. Hopefully someday HIV and AIDS will no longer be an issue, but until then let’s show our support for the people who are strong enough to survive with it.